The Fete Blog

John and I are on a precipice– where we know we are going to make some changes in our lifestyle in the coming months, but the journey is still a bit unclear. We have a few potential end results and other than that… we have each other. But for as much as I worry (I’m a constant worry-er), I realized something yesterday: for all the crazy things I want to do with my life, there really is no better partner than the one I have. At the root of it all, John and I support one another and are willing to let each other live out our dreams any way possible– even if that means we have to make some sacrifices in our relationship.

I thought to this very image and quote during one of our conversations yesterday and it comforted me; it really IS all about who you partner up with (it doesn’t have to be romantically) on the road. Literally and figuratively. The best trips you’ve ever been on were likely with a cadre of incredible, supportive, fun people. The best moments of your life were probably the same. Really take the time to give yourself a once-over– who are the people you depend on the most? Is your everyday life (that’s the core part of the journey) filled with people who inspire you, support you, thrill you?

image via imgfave

I like this thought. How often do we get that panicky, anxious feeling when we sense that some part of our life is about to end– a job, a relationship, a project– and worry that nothing will come next? I certainly feel like that, often, when I can’t see what’s to come on the other side of a deadline. But, without fail, I’ve never been left empty-handed, bored, or alone. There’s ALWAYS something waiting and taking comfort in that is a key to sanity, calm, and confidence.

And if we take this thought at face value, it still rings true– maybe a relationship is about to end, and maybe you truly don’t have another potential partner waiting in the wings. But take another look– sometimes the greatest relationship you can be in is with yourself. So take heart– you’re never going to be alone!

image via lockerz

How do you spoil yourself? If it’s not with things that you truly, passionately, luxuriously enjoy, then what’s the point? As a woman– and a wife and eventually a mom and always a friend– it’s easy to convince yourself that someone else’s idea of pleasure is your own, but… it’s not. My husband is beach-obsessed, only wanting to holiday somewhere where he can surf. I’m all up for learning how to surf and I love a good beach… but honestly, my idea of a perfect holiday is to find a beautiful little apartment in Paris and explore the city and countryside for a week. And one of these days, I’m going to do just that, with or without him.

Obviously, that’s a big example, but one that we can definitely apply to our everyday pleasures. Look, we only live once and what’s the point of wasting your free time doing something “for you” that you don’t really enjoy? Don’t love bubble baths? Take an extra long shower and wrap up in your favorite robe instead. Don’t love chocolate? Order a citrusy sorbet on your birthday. If you don’t take your pleasure seriously, it’s unlikely that anyone will (if you’re lucky, you’ll be blessed with a partner or best friend who excels in throwing parties and surprises and they’ll spoil you endlessly). Don’t forget to put YOURSELF first and everything and everyone else will fall into place.

image via Baubau House

Sometimes, you just have to admit it: being afraid– of an opportunity, of a project, of a challenge, of a “what if”– is silly. The only thing holding us back from growth, from life, from success and happiness, is usually ourselves. Think of all the things you were afraid of as a child– maybe it was the dark or going to a new school or the ocean. I’m sure those things don’t scare you anymore! Once you discovered how pointless your fear was, you probably frolicked at the beach, made so many new friends, and slept peacefully through the night. Why don’t we have those realizations as adults?

No one, except your very closest friends, are going to say it, but I will: when you hold back from getting what you want because of fear or uncertainty– you’re being a jerk. Go out and do everything you can to make it happen. Fear is exciting– it means you’re on the brink of something great!

image via Jimmy Marble / ReForm School

Today, I’m going to talk about Boston. How could I not?

I’m a professional runner. Being a runner and running races is my job; it’s what I get paid to do. The Boston Marathon is renowed for being an elite race, for professionals and for amateurs. I’m not a marathoner and I don’t necessarily understand everything about how big marathons are, but even I know that Boston is beloved.

What happened yesterday hit me hard in two ways: I know many of the professional runners who had finished hours before the bombs went off– the official meet hotel, where the “elites” are housed, was right next to the finish line; New Balance, my wonderful sponsor, is based in Boston (I believe the store that my picture is pasted across is right along that finish line stretch); my coach, my best friend, the person who takes care of me on a daily basis (I’m not exaggerating here) was there– he was walking between two hotels right along that final finish line stretch when the bombs went off. A few feet in a the opposite direction and he would have been right where the bombs were.

But what really upsets me– makes me angry– is that this tragedy didn’t hit any of the elites, any of the people getting paid hundreds just to stand on the starting line– it hit the amateurs, the families, the fans. Track and field is not a popular sport; we don’t attract thousands of fans like football or basketball. People don’t think running is cool and runners aren’t heroes like quarterbacks or point guards. But marathons– marathons are something that everyone can do! Something that you can train for at home, a bucket-list kind of goal, something that your friends and family and neighbors can come to watch.

We, the professional runners, need you. We need that fanbase and we need those participants in order to stay relevant, in order to stay employed. If something like this scares people away from running, from coming to races or participating in them… we have nothing.

Yesterday was a hard day. Why is this level of tragedy becoming a commonplace thing? What we all need– desperately– is a group  hug. I’ll resume blogging normally tomorrow. Today I’ll just be waiting on pins and needles for my coach to make it home– and sending out all my love to all of you, for everyone you know in Boston and with the hope that this week becomes a bit brighter.

image via Sugarpie Project

I wanted to write you a little love note today– but I thought Mr. Fitzgerald said it better. Did you know that someone somewhere thinks of you this way? Well, today that person is me. I’m so in awe of the amazing things that you all do every day; when I hear about your world– whether it’s via social networking, real life interactions, or just a much-overdue phone call– all that you do and accomplish keeps ME going. So thank you. For being an inspiration to me and for being oh-so-wonderfully you. Go out and be lovely today!

image via Captivated

This week’s thought comes from John; I scrolled through a long batch of options and this is the one he stopped upon. “Why?” I asked him. “Because you’re afraid of hard things,” he replied. “You crumble like a biscotti when you think something is too difficult. But if you want it bad enough, you can do anything.” {This might have something to do with the breakdown I had yesterday, where I cried and said a certain task before me was too hard for me, that I wouldn’t be able to do it.}

So there you go world. The word according to John Jefferson: we can all do hard and scary things, if our heart is true, our motives are pure, and our passion is pumping. I remember an old friend telling me a similar story: that her mom would tell her “You can do hard things” when she was afraid. Sometimes, you just need to be reassured. Nothing is too hard if you want it bad enough!

image via eighteen 25

Yes– today is unofficially a day for love. Not in the Hallmark, Valentine’s sense of the word– in a raw, genuine way. We don’t even need to get political about it. Let’s just use this as a reminder that today, and all days, should be centered around and lived with love. Share your love a little bit– whether it’s with your partner, a parent, your child, a friend, your work, a stranger. What’s the point of spending another day clammed up, afraid to say how you really feel, afraid to get what you really want, focused on the hard to-dos and bills and problems, when instead you could be spreading a bit of loveliness?

image via Joie de Vivre

This is my thought process right now: if it’s not exciting, enthralling, or engaging, it’s not worth my energy. (Okay, this doesn’t count for basic things like laundry or email.) What’s the point of doing work that doesn’t wrap you up in its arms and make your heart go aflutter? If it won’t make your dreams come true, it’s not worth the energy. Take a look at the projects on your plate, the plans for your year, the people and things you’re committed to. If 80% of those things aren’t where your heart really lies, maybe it’s time to rethink your plan.

The best thing about responding to every call, every indication, every subtle pang that excites you deep down in your soul is that you wind up cultivating a lifestyle that is so authentically, beautifully yours, it’s magical.Life will always come with hard, boring, stale moments and to-dos– but that doesn’t mean you  need to settle for it. Find what you truly love and are curious about– then do it.

image via Mystic Rose

How many times do we act without thinking, lash out at how unfair the world is, moan about how hard our day is, without realizing that we’re being watched? You’re rarely ever truly alone– you likely work around people, live near neighbors, go out into the world, have children, have a partner, have friends. These are all people you’re influencing and while I’m all for being real as much as possible, don’t forget about your cosmic Klout score. What you do and how you do it really does make a difference– because at any time, you could be someone’s role model and you could be influencing someone.

This kind of reminds me of that cheesy quote “Smile, because you never know who’s falling in love with your smile!” Seriously– you do make your mark on your world and it’s very likely that at least once a day, you inspire someone around you. Don’t let that freak you out, but let it inspire you to be the best version of You you can possibly be. When you’re ready to give up, feel weak, gossip and bitch and bemoan your lot in life, think again– all those things you’re sighing over could be the very thing someone is swooning over.

Image via M*RKologie