The Fete Blog

Hooray! You’re on your honeymoon. Time to kick of a life of love with beach drinks, adventures, endless sex, long meaningful walks and deep conversations, delicious dining, laughter, smiles, and lots of lounging. Was that what your honeymoon was like?

Let’s get real. As much as honeymoons are fun and memorable, they’re also often more drenched in reality than that. Honeymoons cost money. Honeymoons are your first opportunity to really experience relationship practices that will be constants in your life to come: compromise, putting other’s needs first, learning how to travel and navigate the world with another person always by your side. And that can be tough, logistically and emotionally– especially if you’ve never traveled with a partner or had to put someone before yourself or even just been to your honeymoon destination before. Travel can be tough, and add in the stress and pressure of a honeymoon… and you could be in for the longest week of your life. It’s supposed to be a happy time, a celebration of your love and (traditionally) the first time you’ve lived together, slept together, been a team together.

Now I’ve only been on one honeymoon and it was pretty non-traditional; the following tips come from my experience and from what I’ve learned or observed from other brides or married friends. Nowadays, everyone lives together before marriage or travels abroad together; honeymoons are becoming either non-existent or occur before the wedding or long after– and can last as little as a weekend or up to multiple months, depending on what you can fit into your schedule and budget. Our honeymoon was 8 days long and it ended up costing us approximately $2,000. The plane tickets were the biggest part of our budget; lodging was second; food was third (although we really didn’t drink that much); transportation (ha, the bus) was last.

So, without further backstory– the Team Jefferson tips for having the honeymoon of your dreams and loving it:

1. Leave your expectations at the altar.

When I got married, it seemed like EVERYONE was getting hitched as well; Twitter and Instagram were blowing up with wedding shots… and honeymoon shots. I was bombarded with images of white sandy beaches, tropical huts, picturesque resorts and smiling couples. “Are we not having as much fun as they are? Should we have done something different? Would so-and-so be happy doing what we’re doing?” I wondered throughout our trip. It was silly and unproductive and it made me judge my honeymoon, when I should have been enjoying it.

I had a lot of ideas of what our honeymoon would be like, but between planning the wedding, planning the rehearsal dinner, and planning activities pre-and-post wedding, I was exhausted. I left it all up to John and while he did a great job, it was inevitable that it would not be exactly the picture I had in my head. And that’s okay– but I had to remind myself, before, during, and after the trip, that it wouldn’t be picture perfect. I’m sure the Instagram shots of our wedding looked just fine– as exotic and adventurous as other people’s looked luxurious and resorty. It was what we wanted and I was happy with it, once I had abandoned all the pressures I was putting on it to be “perfect”.

2. Be realistic about what you can afford.

It’s all well and nice to picture drinks flowing, top tier dining, and fancy excursions– but be honest with yourself, your partner, and your dreams when you plan out your trip. As a newlywed, you’re bombarded with gifts and checks celebrating your new last name; but, sometimes, you’re also welcoming a new bank account and new amounts of debt into your financial world. Fingers crossed you don’t have much debt from the wedding or credit cards or student loans, but on the off chance that you do, booking an overly lush honeymoon on top of it all might not be the smartest move.

I’m not advising you to be a saint and have a bare bones trip– but think seriously about whether only the penthouse will do or if you can make it work with a lower-level hotel room, or a smaller rental car, or only one or two excursions instead of the whole shebang. I guarantee you, if you’re spending time with your soulmate, sitting out on the daily couples massage or the horseback ride on the beach at sunset really isn’t going to be missed. Give each other massages and walk the beach at sunset– those are guaranteed to be budget-friendly (and memory-building) alternatives!

3. Ask yourself, “What does my husband want to do right now?” at least once a day.

Your honeymoon is all about beginning your married life together– which means it shouldn’t be all about you. Yes, you should have a 50% (okay, 75%) say in the plans and the rules and what you get to do, see, eat. But– surprise!– you are now part of a team and your partner and his/her needs should be taken into account regularly. That sounds preachy, but to be honest, it’s a challenge for me– when it’s only been about you your entire life, what was once normal occasionally seems selfish. No, you should not have cereal for dinner every night because your husband has higher dietary standards and you need to take into account his needs. But I digress.

On your honeymoon, it’s so easy to do what you want to do. It’s vacation and your definition of “holiday” might be completely opposite from your new spouse’s. I’m not asking you to be a matyr and do only what your partner wants to do and neglect your own needs and happiness. But at least once a day, ask yourself, “Are we doing something ___ wants to be doing?” If the answer is yes (and you’re happy)– hooray! You’ve mastered compromise and your duo seems to be in sync. If the answer is yes (and you’re unhappy)– take a look at the situation. Is there a way you can tweak the circumstances to make it more fun for you? If the answer is no (and you’re happy)– how can you bring your partner into the situation (nail painting, sky diving, lounging on the beach) and make you both happy? If the answer is no (and you’re not happy)– I can’t help you. I have no clue what kind of situation you’ve gotten yourself in to…

4. Don’t put pressure on sex.

Okay. Let’s just open it up: when you’re married, sex can become a whole different situation than when you weren’t. Maybe you have more sex; maybe you have less. But don’t put pressure on your honeymoon to be the precedent for the rest of your married sex life. I had several moments where I suddenly thought, “Should we be using this time to have sex? Why aren’t we having sex? Is there something wrong because we haven’t had sex three times today?” The answers will be different for every couple– but any time I thought too hard about it or asked “Are you happy, are we having enough sex?” or put pressure on it, it turned us both off the whole idea. Sex will happen and it will happen on your own mutual schedule. Starting off your marriage with the idea that the entire honeymoon will be spent in bed could have really negative consequences (like it or not, you will have to get out of bed for occasional dinners or showers). If you don’t have much sex on your honeymoon, nothing is wrong with you– maybe you’re busy having adventures or cultivating the platonic part of your relationship (being FRIENDS is important in a romantic relationship too). If you’re having a lifetime’s worth of sex on your honeymoon, don’t go home to a full scheduled life and assume it will necessarily be the same. Have sex when the mood strikes, don’t keep track of how much or how little that amounts to, and have FUN with it. That’s all you really need to know.

5. Keep calm. Communicate. Be honest about what YOU want.

Have an open mind throughout your honeymoon. Something– hopefully something insignificant and minor– will go wrong. Maybe you forgot to take a picture of your favorite tree. Maybe you lost your luggage. Maybe you don’t have the chance to do that hiking excursion. Maybe you drank too much one night. Whatever it is, there will be tiny tests of your new marriage; by keeping calm and allowing your new partnership time and strength and patience to start working through any kind of challenge, you will have a happy, successful, strong marriage. It’s that simple. The MOST IMPORTANT thing in any relationship is communication. Patience is a close second. If you can start creating a rhythm where those two things are present no matter how big or small the circumstances are, you will be happy.

There will be fights. There will be an afternoon where you just can’t compromise or someone is feeling off. That happens. Fight if it comes to that, but patiently talk through it and communicate rationally and you’ll be back to normal in no time. If you’re honest about what YOU want and your partner does the same, your honeymoon– and your marriage– will be the greatest thing in your life.

What are your honeymoon tips? John and I joke about having another one, since ours was such a different kind of adventure… I’d love to hear your travel-with-a-partner tips and tricks!

So where were we? Oh yes…

John and I had arrived in Costa Rica, only to find (20 minute after arriving), that we were sans credit card/honeymoon money and had no way to rent a four wheeler. We had arrived at our rented lodge, only to find ourselves perched at the top of a mountain– and the beach was all the way down at the bottom. John had dreamed of spending our honeymoon surfing every morning and unfortunately, that dream was dashed.

We were staying at a lodge hosted by Bert, an affable, yet rather eccentric, expat. We were the only guests for the week (save two dogs and two horses), so we had Bert all to ourselves, a blessing and yet slightly awkward. Where we supposed to hang out with him? Was he supposed to entertain us? Besides offering us weed (we declined), he tried to entertain us with offers of horseback rides, ziplining, massage packages. We were too poor to spend money on excursions and resigned ourselves (happily) to having a more lowkey, laidback honeymoon. Bert cooked us gourmet meals every night– I wish we had snapped pictures of them, but dinner was always so late, we were usually too hungry to style Instagrams. John’s favorite dinner: chicken wings, covered liberally in a cilantro lime sauce. Heaven.

When we woke the first morning, Bert told us that he couldn’t leave the lodge alone too often– so if we wanted to get down to the beach, we’d probably have to hire a taxi and that could get expensive (he was happy to give us rides once in awhile, but we weren’t keen on depending on someone else for eight days). Little did Bert know– we spend our days running and occasionally run up hills. Our first morning in Costa Rica, we packed up my little New Balance backpack, put on some sturdy shoes and bathing suits, and embarked on our hike down the mountain.

It wasn’t bad– was probably 30-35 minutes down the mountain. At the base of the mountain was a sweet little town and across a highway, a beach. It was quiet– the entire week, we saw approximately 6 people on that beach. The first day, we explored and climbed and frolicked– and then started our hike back up the mountain.

Near the bottom of the road was a waterfall– and it became our secret spot, our little motivation for getting up the mountain. It was cold, cool, quiet. Howler monkeys leaped around in the trees above us and John climbed up to a rope swing and crashed into the water every day. Once we were cooled off, we embarked on our trek. The climb up was probably close to 45-50 minutes and there were probably two sections where we were going straight up. We were sweaty, we were hot and in the sun, but we were together. And we had the promise of wifi and Bert’s dinners awaiting us. So we hiked.

We did it every day. John made his way to the big town (relatively speaking) of Dominical and rented a surfboard for a few days. Yes– he hiked up and down that mountain with a surfboard. The little beach at the base of our mountain had okay waves, but not the kind of surf John was really hoping to do.

One day, we ditched the surfboard and went down the mountain a different way. We scaled some cliffs and found a secret beach– and then we were so far from our road up to the lodge that we hiked along the highway for an hour trying to get back. We found a little fish market down the highway from our mountain that sold fresh ceviche for cheap– we devoured it for a pre-dinner snack as many days as we could! On our last day in Dominical, we ran– yup, ran, with a backpack and surfboard– down the highway 4k to the bigger beach, so John could get some real waves.

We ended up going back to San Jose a day early, because we had to bus back North and didn’t want to risk a bus being late for our flight. We got up way too early, caught three different buses and a taxi, but finally made it to an airport hotel. We were supposed to fly out to Fort Lauderdale around noon; because of delays, we didn’t leave until about 3pm. We ran through customs, praying we would make our connection– only to have it be delayed. And delayed. And delayed, until we saw a group gathering at customer service around 10:45pm. We hurried over. The flight was canceled. The next flight up to BWI (remember, never fly through there!) was the next morning at 7am. Ouch.

Eventually– we made it home. Hopefully stronger (physically, from six days of hiking up and down a mountain), definitely a bit battered, but confident– if we could get through that decidedly NON-RESORT honeymoon, we could get through anything.

Stay tuned– some honeymoon lessons for newlyweds and a mini-guide to Costa Rica to come!

Whether we’re ready or not, winter is upon us (sorry NYC-ers hit by snow). We can either gripe about how freezing it is or we can use the gray weather as inspiration for an adventure: winter travel! If you’re heading home for the holidays, try to carve out a quick weekend (or even better– week days! Better for travel, better for fares, better for your sanity) for a special Winter 2012 Trip. John and I are already trying to navigate the tricky and busy holiday season with family all across the country– but here are five dream trips that are giving me winter wanderlust–>

Cape Town, South Africa

I’ve been a bit obsessed with Cape Town lately (it’s probably from following Miss Moss’s blog so much). I am desperate to go– who wants to join?? PS. Miss Moss’s Cape Town City Guide is divine! image via Photo Fly Travel Club

Lausanne, Switzerland

Arguably the most beautiful town in Switzerland. It will probably be cold in the winter, but for this view? I’ll take it! image via flickriver

The Maldives

Ahhh. Just look at that image and tell me you want to stay cooped up in snowy North America. Nope. image via Pinterest

Whistler, British Columbia

BUT, on the other hand… a snowy winter escape might be on the horizon. I know my compatriot Kim loves skiing at Whistler. I’ve never participated in any kind of snow/winter sport, so maybe getting my feet wet in a gorgeous place like this is just what I need! image via AmericaPictures

London, England

Okay. I really, really, REALLY want to spend a winter (or a lifetime) in London. It would certainly be a proper winter, but oh! Spending the holidays wandering around these streets? Yes. I think that’s exactly what I need. image via Pinterest

What winter escapes are you craving? Will you head south for the season or do you want to embrace the snow and ski your heart out? 

“I DO NOT want a resort honeymoon. No way. Don’t even think about booking us a Courtyard Marriott, I will not stay there. I want an adventure,” I protested to John months ago, when he started thinking about planning our honeymoon. Well– I got what I wished for. We most certainly DID NOT have a resort honeymoon experience.

Here’s the whole gritty story: we were planning on going to Funchal, Portugal for a week. John’s grandparents are part of this timeshare program where we could get access to a whole book o’spots to honeymoon at a decent price. Well, that sounded a lot like “resort” honeymoon experience to me, but they were so gracious and it was such an amazing gift that of course I was excited. So John and I searched for something a little more out-of-the-way and settled on Portugal. Great! We were excited.

But then some things didn’t play out as we hoped, financially, and flights to Europe are expensive. So going to Portugal didn’t seem like such a great opportunity after all. So we had to look again and in a whirlwind 12 hours, about two weeks before the wedding, we changed all our plans. Dominical, Costa Rica, it was!

John and his twin Sean had been to Costa Rica before, where they surfed about 12 hours a day (supposedly). We decided to go a little further South down the coast, where John could still surf, but where we could explore the mountains and have some off-road, non-tourist adventures. We found a fabulous lodge via Airbnb, booked a rental car, snagged our tickets on Spirit Airlines, and voila! A honeymoon.

It wasn’t so smooth in real life, however. We showed up to BWI (note: if you live in VA or DC, never ever fly out of BWI. Every time I fly through there, I swear “Never again.” It might be cheaper, but it is not worth the drive hassle) at about 5am to fly out on an early am flight, to find that while Spirit Airlines might be cheap cheap cheap ticket-wise, they get you on the extras. Every single bag we brought was charged– yes, even carry-ons. You had to pay to get a bottle of water on the flight. Then they kill you with loud announcements about credit cards and whatnot. Not so worth it.

Then we arrive in San Jose. We had a little bit of cash, so we exchanged it to gauge how much we’d want to pull out of the ATM. All our “honeymoon money” was in John’s account, on his card (all my money was “wedding money”). We head to a little ATM, pull out some cash, take the receipt and leave. A rental car agent picked us up and drove us about 15 minutes away from the airport to get our rental car. We’re all set to go, signing paperwork, putting down John’s card for payment, when… wait… look over there… is it in there?… oh NO. His card was gone.

Yup. We had left it in the ATM. About 25 minutes earlier. There was no way we’d find it.

So then it was a scramble. International phone calls, calling his bank to cancel the card, calling my parents to beg for a loan (how embarrassing!), trying to deal with the car people. It boiled down to this: we could get the car for about $500, but they’d also put a $1,300 hold on the card. We were just left with mine, which was tied up with paying wedding bills. There was no way we could get the car.

SO, we shouldered our bags and made our way to a bus station. Luckily, we made it on a bus heading South as soon as we got to the station and settled in for a 3 hour trip down the coast. We were both surprisingly stress-free– we had no money, but we were together, seeing the country like locals!

We made it to Dominical and called up Bert, the owner of the rental lodge. He had told me in Airbnb messages that his place was at the top of a mountain, meaning we’d need four-wheel drive to get anywhere. When we arrived in town, he said he’d come down and pick us up. And as we started driving towards his place, my heart started sinking. We were going up. And up. And up. And up. The road was brutal, tossing the car around. And we were still climbing.

The lodge itself was a pretty old thing– five rooms and a separate two-story cabin. We were Bert’s only guests, so he was super accommodating. We had gourmet meals cooked for us every night; he offered to give us rides down to the beach once in awhile. But our honeymoon had quickly changed.

Tom Daly

Remember that little Travel Series we had a few months back? We had an awesome outpouring of tips, tricks, and advice from you, dear reader. Rather than keep them stuck in the comments sections, we needed to round them up and put all the travel goodness in one place.

Where– we asked where were some of your top travel spots:
-”I just want to go anywhere with a beach. A roll-out-of-bed, step-outside, and lose-the-stress type of place.” (Brian)

-”San Miguel de Allende is one of my dream spots.” (Jill)

-”East Asia, specifically Thailand or Vietnam. I am strongly motivated by my taste buds.” (Becky)

Why– what inspires you to travel?
-”I’m always inspired to visit my friends abroad! Since I think a local perspective is always best, I work hard to be able to visit when these opportunities arise.” (Meredith)

-”I find travel inspiration all around me… from a fabulous tale from a friend, a new blog post, a phone call from a far away place or even a pretty dress in a store window…” (Megan)

Where, again– how do you know where to stay?
-”HomeAway is one of my favorite websites, although we just got a great deal on a villa in Puerto Rico through Living Social. They have great deals for vacations on a budget.” (Jill)

-”I used to use hostelworld a lot for cheap deals on group lodging and guesthouses. Clean sheets and a hot shower and I’m pretty content.” (Becky)

Before you go– tips on packing:
-”I focus on items that dry easily and bring small detergent packets for washing them in the sink!” (Becky)

-”I have to remind myself that if I don’t wear it at home, I’m probably not going to wear it on vacation. I have a tendency to think that if I pack it, I’ll definitely find a way to wear it, where I should probably just leave it at home or, even better, give it to the Salvation Army if I haven’t worn it recently.” (Sarah)

-”I always pack one extra white t-shirt. They go with everything, but are also the one I’m most likely to ruin on the road so I need a back up.” (Jill)

-”I think packing can be a major source of travel stress. Usually I make a list of everything I need, then lay out my clothes and shoes by outfit on the bed before anything goes into the bag. It’s a lot easier to plan and remove unnecessary items when you can see everything.” (Annie)

How– your general tips!
-”I start long travel journeys to new countries by finding a live/work arrangement… A free place to stay, locals to show you around and instant friends.” (Beth)

-”One of my favorite things when I travel is to get advice from those who have been there before. When I went to Paris for the first time I had three letters from friends. The first was my mentor. She had lived in Paris for a short time and had an amazing view of the city for me. She let me in on her little secrets, her favorite places. Then there was the local. She had a completely different view and it was amazing! I got to go to places that I never would have found a tourist guide book. The last was a distant friend who loved jazz and he sent me to some really fun spots with great, cheap food.” (Sera)

-”I always carry a photocopy of my passport & debit card in my carry-on, and leave it in my hotel safe when I travel just in case anything happens to the originals. I also leave a photocopy at home with someone I trust.” (Jill)

-”I am a chowhound and tripadvisor junkie before I travel. I always have a list of good restaurants on hand because I love to find the best possible places to eat when I’m traveling.” (Sarah)

-”Let your husband plan and just go along for the ride.  Using trip it and yelp also helps to get organized before the adventure begins.” (Amanda)

-”I used to be a guidebook junkie, trying to check off all the sights on a given list. In the end, I think that can generate more stress than it eliminates. Travel affords the opportunity to both be in a new place and to also break out of your normal persona. A few years ago I (kind of) said hasta la vista to compulsive planning on international trips. Instead, I do a broad overview of the country, get a sense of the possibilities and in-country limitations and pick one or two “must-see” sights or cities. Everything else is up in the air and decided day by day. In the end it is a nice balance of checklist items and random, off-guidebook adventures.” (Becky)

-”Always check local foodie websites before traveling to make sure we hit the best “secret” spots – just think of the places Cville visitors would miss if they weren’t in the know!” (Kelly)

-”Eliminate pre-travel stress with spreadsheets! No one says you have to stick to it while you’re traveling, but if you’re going to a place where there’s a million places or things you want to see and do, lay it all out on a spreadsheet, sorted by Things to Do (hike, swim, theater, etc.), Things to See (castles, fountaints, etc.), Things to Eat (restaurants) and Things to Drink (Um, duh?). Then start mixing and matching to figure out what goes together, and plot it out for each day. If you wake up and feel like getting breakfast at a certain restaurant, you’ll also know that it makes sense to do X and Y while you’re there!” (Brian)

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Now that it’s summer and you’ve (hopefully) gone on a few travel adventures, anything to add to these lists? My few contributions:
-As annoying as it can be, sign up for air miles!! Getting that cheaper upgrade on an international flight can make all the difference.

-Eye mask. Crucial for sleeping on long flights.

-When packing, especially if I’m trying to cram a lot in, I find rolling my clothes makes it a lot easier to squeeze a few more things in.

-To save a little on international cell phone use, download Whatsapp– it’s just like Blackberry Messenger or iMessage, but it’s cross-platform and it only works on wifi (obviously, if you’re in the States, you can use it on 3G or data). You can keep all your data off and still text away if you’re in a wifi hotspot! Make sure anyone you want to text with has downloaded the app too.

“I say Georgia
Georgia
A song of you
Comes as sweet and clear
As moonlight through the pines

… Still in peaceful dreams I see
The road leads back to you.”

Georgia on My Mind. Song lyrics by Stuart Gorrell, 1930.

I spent a good amount of my childhood in the Deep South. The most common destination for family trips was my grandparents’ house in southwest Georgia. In the summer, my little sister and I would be dropped off for an extended stay. I have fond memories of cane fishing poles, the Piggly Wiggly grocery store, the giant pecan tree in the backyard, red dirt roads cutting through fluffy white cotton fields, perfectly straight rows of tall pine trees. There were family reunions full of fried chicken and strangers– rumored to be relatives– who pinched my cheeks and said how much I’d grown. Sweet tea and soft southern accents with slow Georgia drawls flowed freely, as did the compliments for my great grandmother’s pound cake. The days in July and August were sticky hot beyond belief. I swear even my eyelids were sweating from the mere effort of blinking. We sat as still as possible in the shade – snacked on cold boiled peanuts and waited patiently for homemade peach ice cream.

But most of all, I remember southern hospitality. I live in Virginia now, a place full of lovely people. But it just isn’t the same.

Thomasville is awash in southern hospitality. You can’t help but want to pull up a chair and stay awhile. I was extra lucky and had Nan Meyers, the uber pretty, stylish, talented and sweeter-than-my grandmother’s-iced-tea owner of the boutique store Firefly, not to mention talented event planner recently featured in Garden & Gun, as my personal Thomasville guide. Meet her and you’ll ditch pulling up a chair to stay awhile and instead opt for running around where ever this girl on the go is headed.

Photos courtesy of Firefly and Red Fly Studio

Along with all of that hospitality, Thomasville offers a downtown district with interesting architectural details and a variety of stores to browse, from the fascinating Harden’s Taxidermy to the treasures of Relic’s– an architectural salvage and antiques store. Residential roads in the historic district are lined with gorgeous restored homes and old oaks, their branches draped in soft gray swags of Spanish moss. The scent of tall Georgia pines is dotted with the sweet smell of magnolia blooms. And words can’t begin to describe the sprawling plantations just outside of town. Fortunately, Pebble Hill is open to the public so you don’t need my words– you can go see it for yourself.

But there is more than that. This is not just some sleepy old Southern town. Innovation, creativity, modern twists and an exciting proactive entrepreneurial spirit are pulsing through the veins here. The Thomasville Center for the Arts has an impressive calendar of activities going on. I was bummed to have missed Due South, an April event bringing together all the good things in life– music, art, and creative dishes celebrating southern food. Studio 209 is a cool space with lots of interesting projects and ideas percolating inside. It also happens to be attached to one of the coolest event spaces ever. I was smitten with those curved white wooden ceiling joists and roll up doors on two sides of the room.

I wish I’d had more time to soak it all in– maybe even worked in a little fishing or a round of shooting clays at Myrtlewood Plantation. I suppose I’ll just have to visit again. Or maybe a few times. A girl could get used to the good life in Thomasville.

{photos by Kim Speer}

Stay | 1884 Paxton House Inn. Run by a retired Army Colonel. I’ve heard she (yup. She) is a quite the hostess.

Eat | Sweet Grass Dairy. Love this idea and the perfect style with which it was executed. Sweet Grass is a local dairy that opened up a shop in town. They sell a variety of cheeses including their own, as well as olive oils, cured meats and other items. But don’t just rush in to grab and go. Grab a seat at the giant wooden table and linger over a cheese plate and a cold beer or glass of wine. If I lived in T’ville, I’d be here every evening. And quite fat. And quite happy. Liam’s. Comfortable, classy style and good food. I devoured my leg of lamb sandwich at lunch. And continue to crave another one as I write this. They don’t skimp on the meat. Meanwhile, the brie and truffle aioli take it to a level of perfection I rarely find in a sandwich. Definitely splurge on the truffle oil and parmesan upgrade for the fries. Open for dinner and weekend brunch as well. Short on time? Grab a hot dog at the Billiard Academy’s walk up window.

Sip | If you are looking for a drink that will wake you up, get your java fix at Grassroots Coffee. They roast their own coffee and have a selection of breakfast items, a sandwich list for lunch, and even a few things to satisfy that sweet tooth. But if you are looking for a drink that will loosen you up, Bacchus wine bar was set to debut a few days after my visit. I drove by for a peek and it looked like it will be a pretty hip place to sit and sip.

Shop | Firefly is divine. I’ve already ordered several items off their website. The Valencia cuff bracelet is prettier than I could have expected and immediately went on my wrist the second I opened the package. Oh and p.s. Firefly’s gift wrapping is adorable. C.H. Whitney has an exquisite collection of antiques and from what I understand, Mr. Whitney is a invaluable source for decorating advice. Harden’s Taxidermy is a must see. Perhaps a rattlesnake belt or money clip would be a great gift for your beau. Relic’s is an architectural salvage and antiques store. I could spend a lot of time in this place. Loved the vintage mail bags converted into sturdy totes. A Different Drummer Antiques had beautiful prints (a lot of hunting scenes), vintage fishing gear and other treasures. I would love to cover my walls in art from this store. The Bookshelf is a light, airy bookstore with a cupcake shop, Lucy & Leo’s, opening any day now (or possibly already open by the time of writing). Check out the fun, locally made super hero capes for kids. Unfortunately, my time was limited so I didn’t make it to everything. Some others to note: Kevin’s Fine Outdoor Gear & Apparel, Toscoga, Relish, and Forever Retro.

Visit | Pebble Hill Plantation is an amazing plantation, lived in through the late ’80s with family members still in the area, that is now open to the public. The grounds are breathtaking and the interiors of the house are inspiring. The folks that take care of this estate truly love the home, the land and the family that so generously donated it all and there love shows in the meticulous state of everything. Should you be looking for a destination wedding, it is worth noting that Pebble Hill is available for events both indoors and outdoors. The Big Oak. Shown in the photos above, it’s worth popping by to see. Fun to imagine, too, all the things this grand dame of trees has watched pass by over the years from her spot on the corner.

Play | As mentioned before, there are all kinds of things going on through the Thomasville Center for the Arts so be sure to check their calendar. I think a visit timed to coincide with the Due South event would be fun. In November, there’s the Plantation Wildlife Arts Festival. Or take in some fresh air at Myrtlewood Plantation while fishing or shooting. I saw a wild turkey lope across the dirt path during my quick drive through the property.

The Local Scoop | Thomasville Townie– cool local blog that gives info on local events and openings.

–kim speer

I spent a summer in college studying at Oxford. We had every Wednesday free and weekends off as well. In addition to enjoying life in “the city of dreaming spires,” I had a fantastic time exploring the rest of the country. I hiked along the south coast and was smitten with the wild ponies (not so much the stinging nettles). Took the train up to the beautiful Lake District for hiking and boating. Danced until my feet ached at a brewery in Edinburgh. Was entranced by Les Misérables at a London Theatre. And of course enjoyed many a cold pint at various pubs.

Do you have treasured memories of Great Britain? Or dreams of visiting one day? Can’t make it across the pond for the Olympics this summer? No worries. Bring a little bit of Britain into your life at home.

t-shirt | I love the Charlie + Sarah line of shirts for toddlers and babies. Simple graphics paired with the Brit’s words like lorrie, wellies, chopper, and others.

art | Artwork is one of my favorite ways to document places. I’m particularly drawn to the clean modern graphics of this piece from the Weavers of South Sea shop. I especially love the pop of the red double decker buses.

gifts | There are so many fun ways to use this playful tape displaying the London skyline. Available at Thread Drawn by Tobyboo.

book | Books are the next best alternative to a plane ticket. I love the classic look of this edition of Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes collection.

print | I do love a good accent. And a funny print. This one is from Ex Libris Journals.

home décor | The Union Jack is one of the most stylish flags out there. This photo is a great example of how to work it in to the scene without being too over the top. DIY your own pillow using a guide from Pop Soup Supplies.

–kim speer

When I think about places to visit domestically, my mind automatically goes to a coast– who doesn’t want to visit New York City or California or Florida or Charleston? But when an opportunity to spend a week in Albuquerque, New Mexico popped up, I leaped at the chance. The Southwest has always held a special place in my heart: as a Texas native, there’s something about the dusty weather, the Rocky Mountains, and the stark beauty of Tex-Mex culture that I love.

Full disclosure: I was in Albuquerque for a track meet, so my experience there was not the typical tourist-exploration type. I stayed in a family home in the suburbs of the city, right next to the infamous Tramway, so comments I received from friends who’d been to the city– that it was just “okay” or that there wasn’t much to do– were null. The neighborhood we stayed in was near the prestigious Albuquerque Academy, on the Northeast side of town.

Our house was nestled in the foothills of the Sandia Mountains– and as a lover of the Blue Ridge, I found this range to be exceptionally beautiful.

The view from our backyard.

From an evening run– the Sandia and its surrounding area is laced with paths. See that bridge? The Tramway runs along that road.

Some of the most beautiful sunsets I’ve ever seen! It made up for the massive wind storms that blew in every afternoon.

So is Albuquerque just “okay”? Does it pale next to the New Mexico tourist mecca Santa Fe? I’d definitely recommend Albuquerque for a relaxing yet active long weekend– take a spin through Old Town to shop for kitsch, then hit up Nob Hill (the strip near the University of New Mexico) for boutiques and consignment shopping and delicious dining. Take advantage of the mountains and forget about the altitude by hiking, jogging, or running around the trails by the Sandia. The top of the mountain has a ski lodge and fine restaurant, High Finance– and the view is totally worth the trek.

Albuquerque is beautiful– you just have to know where to stay! Use Airbnb to find a house rental on the outskirts of town, rent a car, and explore.

Eat |  The best part about Albuquerque– the delicious dining! Dion’s for green chili pizza; Flying Star for just about ANYTHING– burgers, pasta, pastries; Frontier for burritos; Las Solita for Tex-Mex lunches; the Route 66 Diner for milkshakes; The Grove in Nob Hill for breakfast, lunch and cupcakes!

Drink |  Dirty Bourbon has an incredible dance floor and, yes, a mechanical bull. Marble Brewery and Imbibe downtown. Monte Vista Fire Station and O’niells (for trivia) in the Nob Hill area.

See |  If you can make it up to the top of the Tramway, it’s not to be missed. Old Town for touristy shopping. And, for all fans of the Oscar Winner No Country For Old Men, the Desert Sands Motel is where Hunter Llewelyn Moss got killed.

Stay |  Hotel Parq Central for a traditional hotel or the Downtown Historic Bed & Breakfast for something more cozy and intimate. If you can find a house to rent, that would be your best bet!

March was the Month o’Travel here on Fête– and we took the opportunity to reveal our tips and tricks for smooth, successful travel and celebrate wanderlust all month long. But it doesn’t stop there– we’re planning on expanding our monthly travel column, which means looking for input from you and your adventures. But more on that to come; for now, we have a winner to announce…

The winner of the {Travelista} Giveaway, including the weekend stay at this fabulous Airbnb property designed by Latitude 38, is Jill Martiniuk!

Thank you to everyone for participating and adding your amazing travel tips and stories to the series. Look for a round-up of reader advice to come this month!

Bon voyage and happy travels!

Photo via here.

“But as to the spirit of the place, I have several rules: One is to grin like a dog and run
about the city. Another thing is from E.M. Forster, who wrote an alleged guidebook
to Alexandria. … wander aimlessly around and … have all your antennae out in all
directions so that nothing, absolutely nothing, is uninteresting.”
- from an interview with Jan Morris, in A Sense of Place: Great Travel Writers Talk About
Their Craft, Lives, and Inspiration, 2004

Today is the final installment of the March {Travel Series}. This Thursday, we teamed up with seven local photographers and asked them to share a personal vacation photo, the story behind the shot, and a bit of advice for how best to document YOUR travels. I had so much fun checking my email as the submissions came in…

Sarah Cramer Shields, Cramer Photo

Maui, Hawaii. Click here to see more!

The Story:
“We were in Maui last August photographing a wedding. We turned the work weekend into a week long vacation. It was AWESOME!”

Hot Tip:
“I try to document everything that is important to me when I’m traveling. The light, the meal, the texture of a walkway or building, the weather and the expressions of different people I encounter. These memories immediately take me back to that special trip when I look at my images.”

 

Anne & Bill Holland, Holland Photo Arts

New Orleans, French Quarter neighborhood.

The Story:
“Moments before, these two young men surreptitiously jumped on the back of a delivery trunk rumbling down Bourbon Street. One of them was unceremoniously dumped on his bum when the trunk hit a bump. At this particular moment they were laughing about it as they returned to their friends. We love this photo because it captures the light-hearted spirit of New Orleans by showing some of its occupants in context with a long-standing business, a cult-favorite French Quarter diner.”

Hot Tip:
“Pay attention to what’s in your background. Keeping it simple, and free from excessive content helps the viewer engage with your subject that much more clearly. And above all, have fun!”

 

Lucy Taylor, Lucy O Photo

Cape Charles, VA on the Chesapeake Bay.

The Story:
“When [my husband and I] travel, we prefer to explore a town that is rich in history and culture which also has amazing food. Cape Charles is pretty quiet and some may say run down but we loved its cute quirks. This is the only gas pump in town and I think it has a lot of old school charm.”

Hot Tip:
“I actually have a love/hate relationship with taking photos on vacation. That is, until I started shooting film again. My travel tip is to pick up an old film camera at your local thrift store and pop in a roll of Fuji 400. Film slows you down and makes you more intentional when you photograph. It’s also really fun and rewarding. I also find that I am much more likely to print my photos when I shoot film. And let’s be honest, what’s the point of having our photos on a computer if we never look at them?”

 

Meredith Montague, Meredith Montague Photography

Jedediah Smith Redwoods State Park in northern California.

The story:
“This is a photograph of my husband, Todd Barnett. We drove up the coast from San Francisco to within miles of the Oregon border in August of 2010. It’s challenging– almost impossible, really– to accurately capture the magnificence of these enormous trees in the Redwood forests. But somehow this image works for me. The angle of the tree trunks and the strong shadows feel almost architectural to me. And I love that Todd happened to be wearing a red fleece, so that he really pops as the sole figure in the frame and adds the crucial element of perspective to convey just how massive the trees are. Those elements make the image work visually.

Mostly, though, I loved that adventure. We had no real agenda. We flew west, bought a map after we got beyond San Francisco, and drove north to see what we could find. We love to travel with loosely defined plans and few expectations beyond some good meals, some good rest, and a bit of exercise every day. Also, I was 3 months pregnant with our daughter when I made this picture, so the image reminds me of an excellent road trip and a really special time in our lives.”

Hot tip:
“Be sure to pack a camera that you are comfortable using and carrying. The pictures definitely won’t make themselves, and you won’t be inclined to pull your camera out of your bag if you aren’t at ease with it technically. And you certainly won’t be inclined to carry it with you all day if it’s too heavy and awkward. So pack something that you’ve used well at home and know you will use on the road. Invest in a good, supportive backpack or shoulder bag.

DSLRs (with or without extra lenses) can be cumbersome and heavy. Film cameras require that you bring a lot of extra film. Point-and-shoot models are small and lightweight but maybe don’t offer the versatility and quality of a more professional body. You might actually think your iPhone takes the best pictures you’ve ever seen. These are all worthy considerations when planning a trip and packing your bags. Sometimes I pack my big DSLR, sometimes I just take my phone. There’s no right answer; the point is simply to think ahead about the kinds of images you want to make and then to commit to carrying the appropriate gear. I once traveled in Europe for 8 weeks with a small digital point-and-shoot and a Holga with a dozen rolls of B&W film. Since I was backpacking I didn’t want to carry too much weight and that combination of small, lightweight gear worked perfectly for that trip.”

 

John Robinson, Robinson Imagery

Paris, 5th Arrondissement.

The Story:
“I think this photo illustrates how shooting the people of a place adds interest to a photo and can really illuminate the soul of that place. I wanted to take a photo of this beautiful curved street with Le Pantheon in the background. It’s a gorgeous street, but it would be a boring shot with nothing going on, so I waited. When I saw this very chic, very Parisian man come riding along, I knew it would make my photo!”

Hot Tip:
“Shoot the people! The people of a place really tell its story.”

 

Sera Petras, Sera Petras Photography

Paris, view of the Eiffel Tower from the Arc de Triomphe.

The Story:
“I went to Paris the first time for my 30th birthday. I decided when I was 29 that I had to make turning 30 special, so I saved up all year long and took the trip right after my birthday in January. The image was taken from the top of the Arc de Triomphe and yes, you have to walk up a long, narrow, winding spiral staircase. It was a wonderful view once you got to the top and I knew that if I just waited till the sun went down that the Eiffel Tower would be sparkling in the distance– every hour on the hour the tower sparkles. It was so fun watching as the crowd realized that the Eiffel Tower was lighting up! They rushed over to where I had set up and ooh’ed and ahh’ed over the sight.”

Hot Tip:
“Don’t be afraid of the dark. This image of the Eiffel Tower was taken with very low light, but the color that comes out is just wonderful. I specifically submitted a photo I had taken with my little point and shoot camera– the Panasonic Lumix– which allowed me to control the camera with manual settings so I could create the scene that I wanted vs working with the program mode.”

 

Tom Daly, Tom Daly Photography

Ojo Caliente, NM. Click here to see more!

The Story:
“I traveled to Northern New Mexico in August 2011, looking to hit ground I never had in the stunning Southwestern United States. This particular photo was taken in a hot sulfur mineral spring around 10pm. I’d been in New Mexico for a few days at this point, but at this moment I felt like I was just starting to get my feet wet with the vibe of the area. I thought the abstract subject matter (a couple people’s feet) really worked well with the surrounding simple color scheme and mellow light.”

Hot tip:
“Bring your camera wherever you go. What’s the sense in buying that fancy SLR if you’re going to be overprotective of it and not want to bring it places? You need to get yourself in the mindset that the photo is more important than the camera, and that it’s always OK to risk damaging the goods (in a hot sulfur mineral spring) for a memorable photograph.”

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To wrap things up, I decided to share one of my favorites from my personal collection of travel photos…

Sofia, Bulgaria.

The Story:
“This is a photo of my significant other and his mom. We were in Bulgaria on a cold damp day in late November. We’d been looking for a restaurant named “Halbite” and didn’t realize the sign would only be displayed using the Cyrillic alphabet (you can see it on the placemat). I’d studied the alphabet a bit on the plane and there was a thrilling bit of satisfaction– like solving a puzzle– when I de-coded the letters and realized we’d finally arrived at the right place. The restaurant was tucked away at the end of a narrow alley. The sun filtered through the window beautifully. The place was warm and cozy with an extensive beer list and fantastic comfort food. I stood up to take a few shots of the red ceiling, the slew of beer taps, the just right row of bar stools and upon returning to the table was inspired to quickly snap this one. I was fully sated– the food, the scene, the companionship– and, for me, this photo captured the quiet, relaxed post-meal feeling perfectly.”

Hot Tip:
“I use a digital camera so I take a lot of photos, often multiple of the same subject with just a small change in composition or angle or other element. Then when I get home, I set aside a good chunk of time one evening (and a big glass of wine) and I edit and crop and delete down to an album of the best photos that capture the spirit of the trip. I’m a bit obsessive about it to be honest. I’m anti-clutter in general (winces at the irony as I look around my office) and this applies to my pictures too. I still have pretty large albums of each trip, but I like to clean it up so that every photo has an aesthetic or emotional meaning to me.”

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And with that travelistas, we bid you bon voyage and adieu. This is the last of our five-part March {Travel Series}– and the last chance for you to enter our GIVEAWAY. With the late posting– hey, we’ve been traveling and this is posted via Delta Airlines wifi en route to Palm Beach!– we’re extending the giveaway deadline to Saturday, 5pm. Winner will be announced Monday, April 2.

Tell us what you do with your vacation photos. Store them on your computer? Show them off on Facebook? Frame them? Use a program like Shutterfly to make an album?