The Fete Blog

John and I are on a precipice– where we know we are going to make some changes in our lifestyle in the coming months, but the journey is still a bit unclear. We have a few potential end results and other than that… we have each other. But for as much as I worry (I’m a constant worry-er), I realized something yesterday: for all the crazy things I want to do with my life, there really is no better partner than the one I have. At the root of it all, John and I support one another and are willing to let each other live out our dreams any way possible– even if that means we have to make some sacrifices in our relationship.

I thought to this very image and quote during one of our conversations yesterday and it comforted me; it really IS all about who you partner up with (it doesn’t have to be romantically) on the road. Literally and figuratively. The best trips you’ve ever been on were likely with a cadre of incredible, supportive, fun people. The best moments of your life were probably the same. Really take the time to give yourself a once-over– who are the people you depend on the most? Is your everyday life (that’s the core part of the journey) filled with people who inspire you, support you, thrill you?

image via imgfave

image via Pinterest

Lately, I’ve had a few women ask me how they can get excited about bringing fitness, in general, back into their lives– maybe they’ve had a baby or two, or maybe they’ve just been so focused on work and life that the thought of going to a gym or even going out for a run seems daunting or undesirable. When I think back to how I first got into fitness, I think of my mother. As a child, I would frequently accompany her to the local middle school track, where she would run laps and I would try to keep up. She instilled some kind of discipline and desire for running that (clearly) comes through in my current choice of exercise… and, obviously, my body type and affinity for long-distance, endurance-based fitness must come from somewhere! So my first reaction, now, to the question, “What should I do for fitness?” is: work what your mama gave you!

Think about it two ways: what kind of attitude towards fitness did your parents instill in you? (don’t worry; if you were raised in a decidedly un-sports-loving household, you can still embrace fitness today) and what kind of body type do you have? 

image via Saltwater Kids

Look back at the types of sports you did as a kid. Where you part of a soccer team or a softball team? Did you do big group classes of gymnastics or ballet? Or were you more of an individual, a member of the swim team or part of your high school track team? Recognizing the environments in which you practiced fitness as a child can help you find a niche today. If you were always a team player, consider joining your local outdoor adventure club or adult sports team– flag football, rugby, soccer, even competitive frisbee could be your exercise of choice! Meeting up with friends for “practice” and competing as a group might be the best way for you to have fun while getting exercise.

Likewise, if you were an individual athlete, finding an activity conducive to that competitive spirit and self-focus might be a better fit: yoga, pilates, cycling, Crossfit– all could play to your natural urge to be on your own, while giving you a community of fellow individuals to turn to when you need inspiration. And, if you avoided sports like the plague as a kid, look at your other social activities: were you part of a team/social environment or did you like doing things on your own? If you were more of a “loner,” doing something super social for fitness might be a major turnoff– working one-on-one with a personal trainer might be more your speed than jumping onto a team.

image via Jokeroo

And, of course, there’s the issue of what you can physically do. Not everyone is meant to be a runner or a rower or a soccer player. Think of your body in three categories: endurance, flexibility, and fearlessness.

If you have good endurance, high intensity sports could be for you– running, biking, swimming are all high-performance activities, where you’re rewarded by enduring longer. Consider training for a triathlon or a road race! If you’re super flexible, try something totally unexpected– ballet or zumba, yoga or even one of those sexy pole dancing classes. And if you’re fearless, embrace it! Water sports (like kayaking), Tough Mudder races (where you run through fire!), or Crossfit are all types of exercise that really challenge you mentally as well as physically; if you can push through pain or allow yourself to do something slightly scary, you’ll enjoy the actual exercise so much more!

Thankfully, these are all qualities that can be improved upon– so if you’re more of an endurance athlete and not very flexible, trying something that challenges that flexibility will give you tremendous results! But if you’re just starting out with fitness again, playing to your strengths will lead to more fun, more enjoyment, and more exercise!

Next time you’re struggling with your fitness or asking yourself, “Why should I exercise? I don’t know what to do!” take a step back and examine yourself and your fitness history. What didn’t work before probably won’t work now. If heading to the gym is a drag, sign up for a team and make exercise a social occasion! If the thought of working out with a big group of people is terrible, find something you can do completely on your own– and then go out and do it!

What is your favorite form of exercise? Does it fall in line with the type of athlete you were as a kid? How do you challenge and embrace your body?

I like this thought. How often do we get that panicky, anxious feeling when we sense that some part of our life is about to end– a job, a relationship, a project– and worry that nothing will come next? I certainly feel like that, often, when I can’t see what’s to come on the other side of a deadline. But, without fail, I’ve never been left empty-handed, bored, or alone. There’s ALWAYS something waiting and taking comfort in that is a key to sanity, calm, and confidence.

And if we take this thought at face value, it still rings true– maybe a relationship is about to end, and maybe you truly don’t have another potential partner waiting in the wings. But take another look– sometimes the greatest relationship you can be in is with yourself. So take heart– you’re never going to be alone!

image via lockerz

How do you spoil yourself? If it’s not with things that you truly, passionately, luxuriously enjoy, then what’s the point? As a woman– and a wife and eventually a mom and always a friend– it’s easy to convince yourself that someone else’s idea of pleasure is your own, but… it’s not. My husband is beach-obsessed, only wanting to holiday somewhere where he can surf. I’m all up for learning how to surf and I love a good beach… but honestly, my idea of a perfect holiday is to find a beautiful little apartment in Paris and explore the city and countryside for a week. And one of these days, I’m going to do just that, with or without him.

Obviously, that’s a big example, but one that we can definitely apply to our everyday pleasures. Look, we only live once and what’s the point of wasting your free time doing something “for you” that you don’t really enjoy? Don’t love bubble baths? Take an extra long shower and wrap up in your favorite robe instead. Don’t love chocolate? Order a citrusy sorbet on your birthday. If you don’t take your pleasure seriously, it’s unlikely that anyone will (if you’re lucky, you’ll be blessed with a partner or best friend who excels in throwing parties and surprises and they’ll spoil you endlessly). Don’t forget to put YOURSELF first and everything and everyone else will fall into place.

image via Baubau House

image via Pinterest

Happy Fitness Thursday! I hope you have time to make a trip to the gym or lace up your shoes to go for a lovely jog today. Consistency is the fast track to progress and hopefully these fitness posts have helped you find some motivation or guidance for adding fitness into your lifestyle!

But while consistency is helpful, becoming a fitness goddess is not going to be easy. It IS easy to come up against challenges in your fitness plan– plateauing, not having the motivation to keep going, facing a race or a pose or a move that seems impossible to complete. No matter what form of exercise you embrace, you’re going to have a hurdle to overcome eventually. But that’s the key to growth– overcoming.

image via tranquil 

What’s your current fitness challenge? Are you trying to up your mileage? Are you looking for motivation to get in the pool and start swimming twice a week? Are you struggling in a spin class or bored of your weight lifting program? Are you nervous to take it to the next level?

I personally struggle with a few things: balance (silly, I know) and mental strength. I’ve always known I have poor balance– anytime I have to do a drill standing on one leg, I wobble and fall over within seconds. I started yoga a few weeks ago and haven’t been able to go as often as I’d like (anything is better than nothing though!) and quickly realized I really need to work on this balance problem. In my second class, we went into tree pose– the first image in this post– and it took all my concentration and power to string together a few seconds on one leg. I’m not quite sure how to fix this– more yoga? Certain drills? Strengthening my legs more? But that’s my current project.

On the mental side of things, I always seem to scare myself out of pushing past the pain in the final seconds of an interval. I just get scared or tired or a combination of both and my brain says, “You can’t do this.” And, after a few seconds, I tell myself, “I can’t do this.” But when I’m really pushed, by my coach or someone in the workout with me, I can always do it. I can always finish with a fast last lap; I can always make it through without collapsing; there is more strength there than I think. So quieting that doubt and that fear (it’s for jerks, remember?) is going to be a game changer for me. I can always do it– and once I know I can, there won’t be any barriers.

I’d love to hear about what you’re currently working on and/or struggling with! Do any yogis out there know how I can work on my balance? I’m going to master the tree pose eventually… 

Sometimes, you just have to admit it: being afraid– of an opportunity, of a project, of a challenge, of a “what if”– is silly. The only thing holding us back from growth, from life, from success and happiness, is usually ourselves. Think of all the things you were afraid of as a child– maybe it was the dark or going to a new school or the ocean. I’m sure those things don’t scare you anymore! Once you discovered how pointless your fear was, you probably frolicked at the beach, made so many new friends, and slept peacefully through the night. Why don’t we have those realizations as adults?

No one, except your very closest friends, are going to say it, but I will: when you hold back from getting what you want because of fear or uncertainty– you’re being a jerk. Go out and do everything you can to make it happen. Fear is exciting– it means you’re on the brink of something great!

image via Jimmy Marble / ReForm School

Whew– what a week, what a week. You might have noticed it was quiet around here– apologies, but I’m sure we were all a bit distracted by what was going on in the world. I couldn’t get into my normal routine; motivation to blog about weddings or party inspiration or interiors was pretty low. John and I have been glued to our TV and news blogs non-stop; he poured over images of the suspects, desperate to crack the case; I just wanted to do nothing. In the middle of it, our best friend turned 30, and I poured all my energy into celebrating him for a day. And now, thankfully, thankfully!, the terror is over. And maybe the world can be given a reprieve for a few weeks.

Cute babies and puppies– all day, every day. Please. image via seek(ing)

I’m sure we’re all going to be hitting the blogosphere this weekend, for much-needed rest and recovery away from the never-ending news cycle. Some pretty and fun things to revive you–>

-Are you a grapefruit person? These grapefruit muffins by Elsie and Emma look DELICIOUS! High on my to-bake list.

-My kick-ass wedding planner Meghan Streit wrote up this lovely post for Borrowed and Blue– tips for spicing up the details at your wedding!

-Don’t have a huge backyard? Emily shares some small yard eye candy.

-Kat talks about the overwhelming rise of styled wedding shoots (and shares some legitimately marvelous ones from Lisa Devlin’s Photography Farm). I have to agree– when I first started styling editorial shoots, it was reserved for the big time magazines. Now, every publication and blog and workshop styles shoots more than might be necessary. It’s becoming slightly exhausting trying to style all the same elements– bride, groom, tablescape, bouquet, dress– in fresh ways. It might be time for something altogether new…

-Take time to dream about your business! Some inspiration and some real-time actions you can do to make all your creative dreams come true.

-I love this interview with Anthology Magazine’s EIC– that publication is one of my literary role models!

-Veronica delves into the issue of jealousy– that woman is absolutely brillant.

-I’m sure you’ve seen this Dove Beauty Ad– it’s making waves! Most women view it as inspiring, but some writers find it to be another false representation of “real women”. What are your thoughts?

-C-ville Weekly rounds up the coolest places in Charlottesville– get out and hit up one of these this weekend!

-Are you a blogger who longs for the good ole days of handwritten letters and snail mail? The Postmark Society has just started up– head over, sign up, and get a real life blogger pen pal! I’m so excited for this.

-Nerd alert: Joanna Goddard has been encouraging us to up our vocabulary game– Vocabulary.com is a surprisingly fun learning + procrastination tool! I’m already addicted and I just started playing this morning.

And, in case you missed our (lighter) postings this week–> Photo I Heart | Thought o’the Week | Hitched! Meghann + Derek | Fitness Confession | Charming Winter Bridal Portraits

Happy Saturday! xoxo

Today, I’m going to talk about Boston. How could I not?

I’m a professional runner. Being a runner and running races is my job; it’s what I get paid to do. The Boston Marathon is renowed for being an elite race, for professionals and for amateurs. I’m not a marathoner and I don’t necessarily understand everything about how big marathons are, but even I know that Boston is beloved.

What happened yesterday hit me hard in two ways: I know many of the professional runners who had finished hours before the bombs went off– the official meet hotel, where the “elites” are housed, was right next to the finish line; New Balance, my wonderful sponsor, is based in Boston (I believe the store that my picture is pasted across is right along that finish line stretch); my coach, my best friend, the person who takes care of me on a daily basis (I’m not exaggerating here) was there– he was walking between two hotels right along that final finish line stretch when the bombs went off. A few feet in a the opposite direction and he would have been right where the bombs were.

But what really upsets me– makes me angry– is that this tragedy didn’t hit any of the elites, any of the people getting paid hundreds just to stand on the starting line– it hit the amateurs, the families, the fans. Track and field is not a popular sport; we don’t attract thousands of fans like football or basketball. People don’t think running is cool and runners aren’t heroes like quarterbacks or point guards. But marathons– marathons are something that everyone can do! Something that you can train for at home, a bucket-list kind of goal, something that your friends and family and neighbors can come to watch.

We, the professional runners, need you. We need that fanbase and we need those participants in order to stay relevant, in order to stay employed. If something like this scares people away from running, from coming to races or participating in them… we have nothing.

Yesterday was a hard day. Why is this level of tragedy becoming a commonplace thing? What we all need– desperately– is a group  hug. I’ll resume blogging normally tomorrow. Today I’ll just be waiting on pins and needles for my coach to make it home– and sending out all my love to all of you, for everyone you know in Boston and with the hope that this week becomes a bit brighter.

image via Sugarpie Project

I wanted to write you a little love note today– but I thought Mr. Fitzgerald said it better. Did you know that someone somewhere thinks of you this way? Well, today that person is me. I’m so in awe of the amazing things that you all do every day; when I hear about your world– whether it’s via social networking, real life interactions, or just a much-overdue phone call– all that you do and accomplish keeps ME going. So thank you. For being an inspiration to me and for being oh-so-wonderfully you. Go out and be lovely today!

image via Captivated

I am enchanted with this month’s inspiration shoot, created by some fabulous Charlottesville talent. Planner Colleen Miller teamed up with (Fête sponsor!) Amore Events, Verde Natural Florists, Studio 500, and Daane Studios to dream up this love story– a mix of vintage romance, delicious details, and, of course, lovely love.

The scene: it’s 1950 and three girlfriends gather at a local candy parlor, Confectioners’ Cafe, for some sweet treats and a respite from the heat.

Laney, a newlywed, was waiting patiently for her husband to return from war.

Rebecca awaited the arrival of Andrew, her lovebird. Oh, young love!

But Catherine… what was Catherine waiting for?

Suddenly, a stranger interrupted their party! He was tall, dark, and utterly handsome. Catherine’s heart skipped a beat.

“Would you like to see the hot air balloons with me? There are dozens, filling the sky outside.”

The day grew late as they became more and more enchanted with one another.

“Are you attending the cocktail party tonight?” she inquired.

The evening arrived. The girls were swathed in frothy frocks and lacy gowns, bejeweled in all their finery.

Catherine and Benjamin were locked in their own world.

They couldn’t hide from Laney. She knew the truth.

“Benjamin is the one for you!” she whispered to Catherine.

And he was! All Catherine’s dreams had come true!

And they lived happily ever after… | images by Daane Studios | this shoot was submitted via Two Bright Lights!

Vendors:
Planning & Design: Colleen Miller Events
Décor/ Props: Amore Events by Cody
Florals: Verde Natural Florals
Candy Confections: Sweethaus
Hair and Makeup Styling: Studio 500
Attire: Vintage Vixen
Photography: Daane Studios